Life starts feeling a bit weird when you have a long-term goal in mind. Seems like we need those short-term goals as well, or else we go CRAZY. Also been saving again for the next trip – so restricting myself to finding FREE fun.
I haven’t been sleeping well lately – I’m talking about waking up at 2am thinking it is morning. I’m talking about waking up every morning at 6am only to discover it is too early in the morning. I’m talking about waking up because I’m thirsty, hot, the room is dark, the room is too bright, the room made noise and so on and so on.
Sure this may be normal to anyone past the age of 20, however I relate it to the amount of planning and stress in my life. Perhaps I am getting so caught up with future plans that I cannot live and enjoy the moment of now. Questions keep intruding my mind:
- Is the honeymoon phase of my relationship nearing an end?
- Can I handle this new job for the months ahead as it gets more complicated?
- Is Wellington more permanent than I think?
- Will I buy another one-way ticket to anywhere?
- Why do I miss my friends and family so much this year?
- Will things be the same when and if I return back to the United States?
- Will I ever find one true passion to keep me waking up every morning?
- Do I control my destiny, or someone bigger than me?
New goal – stay patient, stay focused. Everything else will fall into place.